Gambling companies hit the jackpot with charity registration win

“I think we can all agree gambling companies pay out lots of money to Australians, particularly to the Australians who need it the most,” said Henry Bogus, a spokesperson for the Minister for Social Services. ‘In fact, I honestly can’t think of anybody who spends more time engaging with financially struggling members of our community. Official charity status confers long-overdue recognition of this important role.”

The federal opposition opposed the change in regulations on the basis that classifying gambling companies as charities removed the need for them to pay tax, but as Bogus pointed out, complicated overseas ownership structures meant they didn’t pay tax anyway.

Betting industry spokesperson Drew Bloodworth said the move offered a new way for gambling companies to give back. “The government has talked a lot about doubling philanthropy by 2030, and what better way to do it than through tapping into the Australian love of gambling,” said Bloodworth. “Our members are very happy to give six per cent of our takings to charities. Well, maybe not six. How about 0.0006?”

Not-for-profit leaders said the move would benefit the entire sector.

“I think this opens up all kinds of opportunities for sponsorship of conferences, seminars and other giving sector events,” said Philanthroheroes Australasia chair Mary Snidely Whiplash.

“How great will it be to have leaders from the entire sector – charities, philanthropy, social enterprises and for-purpose organisations – all proudly working under the banner of ‘Do your dough betting’?” she said.

“We’re going to have better catering, better showbags, and better quality wines from now on at all our events. We’re going to be able to take bets on how many people will stay awake all the way to the end of a long after-lunch monologue on governance oversight.

“In our preliminary discussions, all that these generous gambling companies were asking for in return were access to our databases and the right to have poker machines in the foyer,” she said.

Our Community founder and leader Denis Moriarty lauded the announcement, calling it a “stunning initiative.”

“I had been concerned by the 1000 days of inaction by the Labor government since the Peta Murphy Report recommended actions on how to tackle online gambling advertising, and the exposure of millions of Australians to advertising from predatory gambling companies, but now I can relax.”

Charities Minister Andrew Glee was not available for comment because it was April Fool’s Day.